


Long Time Gone

by Roxygrl803



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous Band stuff, Flashbacks, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Niall's wedding, Some light smut, m - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-17
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-07-15 13:45:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7224793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roxygrl803/pseuds/Roxygrl803
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and Louis used to fool around a bit when they were in the band together but all that's over now. It's been five years and Harry and Louis haven't seen each other since. Niall's getting married and Louis needs to finally confront his feeling and talk to Harry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Long Time Gone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [PwoperNinjaElf](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PwoperNinjaElf/gifts).



> This was a really fun prompt to write for. I was pinch hitting so I would have written more but didn't really have enough time. I made the relationship a friends with benefits situation as opposed to a one time kiss and freak out moment.
> 
> I wrote the "present" stuff in chronological order but the "past" stuff is in reverse order. You probably could have figured that out without me adding it but, oh well.
> 
> The title is from a Dixie Chicks Song and I don't know why I picked it but when I starting writing this is was one of the first songs that popped into my head.
> 
> Thanks for reading, kudos, and comments:)

PRESENT:

Louis straightened his jacket and looked at his reflection. He looked good for his age. Lines of life on his face were more prevalent than they would have been if he hadn’t smoked so much, drank so much, or worried so much in the band days.

There seemed like a lot to worry about in those days. There was certainly a lot to drink in those days. But all that was behind him now. Now it was time to celebrate. In a suit. Sounded like an oxymoron- celebrating something joyous in a stuffy outfit like a suit. If it were up to him they’d all be wearing jeans and trainers. But alas, nobody asked him. Besides, it wasn’t _his_ celebration. It was Niall’s.

Louis’ cell phone rang in his navy pants that were _maybe_ a little tight. He sighed and put it up to his ear without even looking at the caller ID.

“Yes, Jessica?”

“Just making sure you’re running on time.”

“Yes, I’m running on time. You know, it’s been a year since the divorce. I think I’ve figured out how to manage myself by now.”

“Alright. Just looking out for you darling.”

“I know, Jess. I appreciate it. but really, I’ve got it together. I promise.”

“Ok, then you don’t need me to tell you that your car will be arriving in fifteen minutes.”

“Fuck!” Louis shouted and paused. “Gotcha,” he laughed.

They hung up and he got back to the task at hand. Jessica had been his personal assistant since the band had decided to go their separate ways and he had decided to let Oli have a life. She was good but ever since his divorce she had become a little overbearing. Wanting to make sure Louis was taking care of himself, eating right, not lonely, dating and such. Louis really _did_ appreciate it. Especially when it came to his career. 

He’d been lucky enough to have a career after his career. He’d made a name for himself as an actor and he was proud of that, among other things he’d accomplished. He rest of the guys had gone on to do a lot too. Well, a lot of what they wanted to do.

The black SUV was already waiting for him at the curb when he walked out of his flat. Pleasantries were exchanged with the driver and they began their voyage to the wedding venue. As the people of the city faded away, he began to metaphorically look back on his life. IT had been five years since he had seen Harry, three since he had seen Zayn. It had only been a month since he had seen Niall and Liam though. But it had only been that long because he was finishing filming on a movie and couldn’t attend Niall’s Stag Party. 

He chuckled to himself, remembering that he used to feel closer to Zayn and Harry while they were all in the band. The way things had changed since then seemed unreal. 

 

 

PAST:

“But why? What are you so scared of?” Harry shouted at him.

Louis ran his fingers through his hair and took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down before he turned around to face the heartbreak he knew would be on Harry’s face.

“I’m not scared, Harry. I’m just not certain. You know this. I haven’t been sure for a while and you can’t force something like this on me. Why can’t we just leave things the way they are?” 

“Because that’s not what I want and you know it. It’s not fair to ask that of me.”

Louis shot back. “Oh, but it’s fair to ask the opposite of me.” He asked sarcastically.

He could see Harry was growing impatient. Much as he had been these past five years. Louis had always been the impatient one but little by little, year after year, Harry’s fuse got shorter and shorter. Only when it came to Louis. 

Harry flopped down, exasperated, on the couch in their dressing room.

“No,” He said defeated. “I guess not.”

Louis sat next to him. Pleased things had calmed down between them but depressed knowing where this conversation was leading. They had kept up this charade for a while now. Friends-with-benefits was probably not the best thing to be doing these past five years when he knew how Harry felt. Hell, sometimes he would swear that he felt the same way. He was confused and continuing this…thing with Harry was not a healthy way to settle his confusion. 

“I’m sorry Haz. I just need to see where things go with me for a while. Without four guys around who help make me whole. I need to figure out me without you,” He paused to think and regroup. “And them, for a little bit. It doesn’t mean I don’t love you. I just can’t love you like you want right now. I’m not there and I know you are. You deserve someone who can give that too you.”

Harry was staring at the craft service table, green eyes glistening as pools of tears filled them. Louis knocked his knee against his to try and get a response.

“I know. I know.” He responded disappointedly as a single tear fell down his face. Louis swiped it with his finger before it fell off his cheek and hit his damn faded, raggedy, The Rolling Stones shirt. Harry sniffled and wipes his eyes with his collar.

“Fine. But when I meet some really fit bloke and we become the new Posh and Becks, you’ll be sorry you ever walked away,” He said, half-jokingly.

 

 

PRESENT:

Niall and his finance, Grace, were getting married at Cliveden House. The venue was beautiful and Louis actually caught his breath when he stepped out of the SUV. It was practically a Jane Austin novel come to life. Liam greeted him upon entering Cliveden House with a slap on the ass and a beer in his hand.

“Cheers,mate,” Louis stated bringing the bottle to his lips after clicking it with Liam’s. “So, who’s here already?”

“Harry’s not here yet, mate. Just relax. Everything will be fine.”

“Easy for you to say,” Louis huffed. “You’ve seen him a fair few times since the band.”

“A fair few,” Liam agreed. “You could have too, you know. It didn’t have to be all staggered, impersonal text messages and a Happy Birthday card once a year.”

“Thanks Liam,” Louis said dryly. This is making me feel loads better. Look, I know Ive been a twat these past few years. That’s why I’m so nervous for today.”

“Ok, sorry to add to the nerves. You’ll be ok. Don’t stress. Niall and I are here for you.”

This was a comforting thought. Despite the fact that they were all supposed to be here of Naill. today was about supporting him. And it would be, just as soon as he could take care of the little matter of seeing Harry again for the first time in five years.

When Harry had first come out, right after the band came undone, he had dated a fit guy named Zeek and they were beautiful together. Everyone adored Zeek and thought Harry was the happiest they’d ever seen him. And he was happy. Louis could tell. Through their few text messages about life and through what Louis glimpsed on TV, Harry was content. Not as blissful as had been with Louis, although neither of them said that out loud. But it was obvious, if only to Louis.  


Zeek and Harry had lasted two years before breaking up. The break up was covered via media outlets all over the world and it caused Harry to go into a bit of a hiding. Well, maybe hiding wasn’t the right term. He had just become more reluctant to be in front of the lime-light. Instead, choosing to write songs for others and produce music. His personal life became a boring topic for the gossip rags because he was never seen out and about anymore. 

Louis did the opposite. Shied away from the paps scene as soon as the band was over and then slowly dipped his toe back into the celebrity pool, testing the waters and working his way to the deep end. He dated a few random blondes and brunettes but nobody stuck, until Anna. Anna was the girl he had married, and then became the woman he had divorced a year later. She was sweet and understanding. Until she wasn’t, and Louis knew why. She had found out. She had found out and not by him and it wasn’t fair to her. Luckily the divorce had been civil and she was a woman of honor and she honored their secrets and kept them to herself. She told him that they were his to share with the world if and when he wanted and for that he was truly grateful.

 

 

PAST:

“So, when do you want to sneak away?” Harry whispered in his ear during Zayn’s verse of whatever song they were signing at the time.

“As soon as possible,” Louis whispered back, biting Harry’s ear as he pulled away.

They were playing in Phoenix, Arizona and even thought it was September, it was HOT. Their clothes always seemed to stick to them when they performed but this was different. This was a new kind of sweating. They were not used to 40 degrees…ever, let alone in a month that is supposed to be considered autumn.  
The heat was making Harry handsy, which made Louis randy, which made Zayn, Liam and Naill on high alert, trying to keep secret what Harry and Louis sometimes shared. 

The show ended and they made it back to their shared dressing room without tearing each others clothes off. The dressing room was small but they’d done more in smaller places. As soon as the door shut behind them, Harry’s lips were on Louis’ neck. Sucking and biting into his flesh. 

“Babe, I’m all sweaty.”

“So, it’s hot. I like the way you taste.”

And that was it. The end of the talking. They made out until one of the bouncers knocked on the door enough times they thought he might break it down if they didn’t emerge. 

In a rare overnight stay at a resort in Scottsdale, Niall had somehow convinced the resort managers to let them play a midnight round go golf. They were all to supposed to shower, change and meet back up at the first hole.

Louis and Harry never joined the other three on the golf course. 

 

 

PRESENT:  
Louis followed Liam to the dressing room where Niall was anxiously getting ready. Nialls nephew came sprinting towards Louis the second he walked through the door.

“Louis,” he exclaimed, jumping up for Louis to catch him.

“Hey, buddy!” Louis said excitedly. “How are we today? Wow, you look so handsome..”  
Theo looked down at himself and smoothed his hands over his vest. He wrinkled his nose and put his hands up to whisper in Louis’ ear.

“It’s kind of itchy and Uncle Niall won’t let me play outside until after the party.”

“I know. I don’t like dressing up either. But you know what?”

“What,” Theo asked eagerly.

“You look very handsome. And as soon as the party is over we can go play outside together. How does that sound?”

“OK!”

Having satisfied Theo’s craving to be a boy, Louis turned his attention to Naill. Niall was getting married. It was about time too. He had been dating Grace for almost four years and told Louis after their second month together that he was going to marry her but dragged his feet in finally pulling the trigger. Hell, Louis had gotten married, divorced, AND come out in less time than that. 

Despite all the good and bad that transpired since the band broke up, coming out was the scariest and best thing that had happened. Sure, it had been a right shit show for a few weeks as the tabloids speculated about everything from his first days in the spotlight to the catalyst behind the divorce. But once it had calmed down, he knew it was worth it. The calm and peace he felt now that he was being true to himself was blissful. He couldn’t believe he’d been so stupid to deny this from himself for so long. He could have been feeling this way the whole time. The whole time he was in the band, the whole time he was with Harry. Hell, he certainly wouldn’t have had an affair with Erik while being married to Anna who then caught him and Erik in a compromising position one afternoon in their flat. Yeah, that certainly wouldn’t have happened. 

Everything slowed as the door opened and Louis held his breath, waiting to see who walked in. Black hair and brown eyes cautiously entered the room. Louis let out a quiet sigh of relief and smiled. It was Zayn and sure, he was nervous to see Zayn. It had been over two years since he had seen Zayn but he wasn't as nervous to see Zayn as he was to see Harry. He wasn't ready to see Harry yet. Zayn he could handle. 

Zayn swept Liam and Niall up into big hugs and turned his grin to louis. His eyes were warm and friendly, quite the opposite of the last time they had seen each other in person.

The last time they had seen each other it had been during one of Zayn’s visits home. Zayn had moved to LA full time after leaving the band but would come home to England a few times a year. They would always try to meet up for a pint or two or four and catch up. The last time they had met up, the snow was falling in a way that was not beautiful. IT made everything gloomy and dull. the grey of the day didn’t seem to bother Louis, until it did. 

At this meet up he had told Zayn about his affair. Of course, Zayn had disapproved. He, himself disapproved of his affair! But he was also excited. It was something new and he felt a way he hadn't felt in a long time. Longer than he waned to admit. He just wanted to tell _someone_ and he was buzzing to share with Zayn. The one person he felt he could share it who he wouldn't picture giving him the metaphorical “I told you so” smirk. 

It was obvious Zayn was past that now. He reached out for Louis and embraced him for a good ten seconds before Louis squeaked for fear of suffocation. 

“Long time, Lou,” Zayn said sweetly.

“Yup,” Louis replied, not knowing what else to say.

“So, how are things? Tell that boy you love him yet?”

Louis head snapped to Liam and Niall, cogs in his head turning. 

“You told him!?” He asked, exasperated.

Zayn laughed his bubbly laugh. The same one that turned him from chic to geek over ten years ago, breaking down Louis’ defensive walls and allowing them to become friends.

“Nah, mate. You’re just right predictable is all. You've loved that boy since the first day you met. Took you bloody long enough to figure it out.”

Louis shrugged his shoulders and eased into conversation with Zayn, telling him about his plan, just as he had with Liam and Niall months ago. It felt weird to be back on with Zayn so easily. It was as if they had never lost any time. Louis felt full to the brim. Well, almost the brim. As soon as things were settled with Harry he could feel full to the brim. Even if it ended poorly. Even if Harry laughed in his face, he would still feel full because he’d done all he could do and he was ready.

 

 

PAST:

Harry was panting against Louis’ neck. He slid his tongue down the grove of Louis’ throat and traced it along his collarbone. They had lost their shirts somewhere along the way and Louis pulling one of Harry’s nipples, shuttering in response.

“Shit,” Harry moaned. “You are so hot. I think I could come just from licking your collarbones.”

Louis had Harry pressed up against a wall in the hotel room. He was rutting against Harry’s thigh and giving Harry a hicky that would probably have to be covered up for filming tomorrow. Who’s stupid idea was this “Day With The Band” anyways. He tried not to think about how he liked this so much more than what he was doing lately with girls. Well, one girl, Elle. The girl he’d had a one off with a while back and then, suddenly management decided to go ahead and make her his girlfriend.

“Well let’s not find out, yeah. Want to take you to bed.”

They moved to the king sized bed with the most outrageously oversized white duvet. It billowed and rolled across the mattress practically swallowing the pillows. Louis loved it. He pushed Harry down on the bed and worked to get Harry’s jeans off.

“Damn, Harry, could these be any tighter,” he said as he finally yanked them away at the ankles.

“Why yes, Chandler. They could. Don’t tempt me.”

Louis growled at Harry and bit the top of his pants, looking up at him hungrily. He pulled the pants down with his teeth, taking breaks to nip and kiss at the skin he exposed. Harry’s cock was thick and hard, waiting for release. Louis worked his way up the shaft with his tongue, swirling it around at the tip. He took Harry in his mouth and began to pump up and down. Harry grabbed Louis’ hair and pulled lightly. 

Louis whimpered in pleasure and dragged his mouth off Harry’s cock to pull his own jeans and pants off. He was hard and leaking. The pre-come dripped on Harry’s stomach as he came up to kiss Harry. Their tongues glided against one another and Harry bucked up looking for friction.

“Eager are we babe?”

“Yes, Yes. Want you to make me come.”

With that, Louis went back to work on Harry’s cock, sucking slurping until Harry’s legs were shaking and his toes were curling. He came with a suppressed gasp and Louis swallowed, licking and kissing Harry’s body as he made his way back up to Harry’s face. 

“You’re turn,” Harry smiled, dimples bursting.

 

 

PRESENT:

The ceremony would be starting in an hour, which meant Harry would be arriving at any minute. Louis nervously paced the foyer where guests were entering and signing the guest book. With each new person and couple, Louis would look up expectantly and then get dejected when it wasn’t Harry. 

Liam approached. “All right?”

“Oh God Liam. I just though of this. What if he brings a date? What if he’s with someone? I’m not sure I can do this.”

Liam grabbed his shoulders and attempted to shake a bit of sense into him. “Pull it together. You got this. You’ll be fine. If he’s with someone, he’s with someone. It doesn't change how you feel and it doesn't mean you shouldn't tell him.”

“Right. Right,” Louis gulped, trying to calm down.

“Now go get him Tiger!” he added, slapping Louis on the ass and walking back into the ceremony room. 

Louis stopped pacing and stood up straight. He smiled at the guests flitting in. A small girl came out from the ceremony room and exaggeratedly explained that she was unable to sign the guest book earlier and could he help her. Louis picked her up and handed her a pen. They were both bent over the table, finding the best page to sign on when a low ‘hmm-mmm” interrupted them. Louis looked up, still smiling ready to tell the other guest that they would be done in a minute and almost dropped the poor girl upon realizing Harry was standing in front of him. 

Harry was standing in front of him. In all his Harry glory. He hair was cut short and curled slighting around the edges. He was wearing a black suit with a bright floral print dress shirt underneath. He was smiling; his lips pulled tight making his dimples barely show. 

“Oh, um. Hi,” Louis stammered, rising and sending the little girl on her way.

“Hi,” Harry replied. “How have you been?”

He tucked his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth slightly. Louis was planning to go in for a hug but stalled when he saw this.

“Um, I’m fine.. How are you?”

“Pretty good, thanks.” Harry looked down at the table. “Are you like, the guest book attendant or something?”

Louis fumbled and set down the green sharpie. Harry sauntered up to the table and grabbed a blue sharpie from the plethora of colorful options next to the guest book. The possible gesture was not lost on him.

“Oh, no. no. I was… um, I was waiting for you, actually.” He spluttered out while Harry wrote his congratulatory message in the photo book.

“Ah, yes. Well, here I am,” he smiled.

They fell into an uncomfortable rhythm of conversation. Questions were asked, light-hearted stories were told, and it all felt very shallow. Louis was practically choking on the clunkiness of it all. This was never going to work if they didn’t get past this phase. 

They walked into the ceremony together and Louis looked around for Liam and Zayn. Liam waved Louis over and all of them sat together and watched as Niall married Grace. Nobody was there when Louis had gotten married. Well, not nobody but it was a small affair. Anna had already been married before and didn't want to make a big fuss, which was fine by Louis. They’d had immediate family only. It made sense seeing as Louis’ acting career was in full swing and drawing anymore attention to the wedding than was already being drawn was not the sort of thing he liked, ever, in any part of his career. 

The wedding was beautiful but the reception was a masterpiece. The Great Hall was set up with tables in an expansive rectangle with all the chairs facing in, so everyone could see each other. Each dish of the seven course meal was better than the one before. Two sorbet intermezzos followed the third and fourth course and after each new dish Louis felt like he couldn’t eat anymore. But then the next plate would come and somehow Louis’ stomach would fine room for the next course. 

Eventually the plates were cleared away and the area surrounded by the tables became the dance floor. Through each new phase of the wedding celebration Harry and Louis became more comfortable with each other again. Easy conversations turned to light touches which turned into the two of them dancing to the pop song du jour like silly school girls. 

 

 

PAST:

“Can it be this way forever?”

They had just stayed up all night practicing for their first live performance and the others had all gone to bed. Louis and Harry were the only two awake, laying outside on the giant trampoline staring at the stars. 

Louis turned sideways to face Harry, the springiness of the trampoline made him bounce into Harry a little. “Oh Harold, always so sappy.”

Harry turned towards Louis. Their faces were just inches apart and all the things Louis had been feeling since the first day they met bubbled up inside of him, threatening to boil over. He held back. Harry didn’t. He pressed his lips to Louis’ and closed his eyes. Louis kissed back and keep his eyes open out of pure shock. They stayed like that, in a quiet, closed mouth kiss for a long time. 

Finally, finally Louis worked up the courage to open his mouth just a bit. Harry followed suit and they slid their tongues together, tasting each other for the first time. 

 

 

PRESENT:

The gratuitous, yet stunning fireworks display was sparkling reds and golds above the wedding guests.

“Fuck, If we’re gonna rent out the entire Cliveden House for the wedding we might as well have a fucking fireworks display too,” Niall had told Liam and Louis a few months back.

That sentiment was what set the plan in motion. The plan for Louis to win Harry back. Now that the fireworks display had begun it was Louis’ time to work up the nerve to say what he needed to say for the last five years….. no, longer.

Harry was standing next to Louis, leaning against the balcony railing and staring up and the sky. Louis stood, staring up at Harry and waiting for the cue. The bursts of green and blue to signify his time to lay it all on the line. His insides felt like all the butterflies that first fluttered when he met Harry were coming back to life and had gotten stronger over the years.

Clack. Flash. Whiz. 

Green and Blue. 

Louis turned towards Harry. “Harry?”

“Yeah?” Harry replied without pulling his eyes from the display.

“Um, Harry. Will you look at me?”

Harry seemed to realize Louis had something important to say and dragged his gaze from the sky. 

“I wanted to talk to you about us.”

Harry looked somewhat startled but wiped his face clear as soon as he realized Louis was serious.

“I know you may not think of us as an ‘us’ per say but I think you just need to hear me out. I mean, what we had….what we had was epic. So epic that it scared me shitless and made me run from it.”

Crack. Zoom.

“But I'm done running. I have been for a while. I was a scared boy who didn’t understand what he wanted or how to get it. But I know now.”

Bang. Crash.

“You are my soulmate and my life won’t be nearly as amazing and wonderful and well, epic, without you in it. I can’t not have you with me any longer. I’m so in love with you. 

Clap. Kaboom.

“I have been since I was eighteen and it may have taken me twelve fucking year to sort it all out and tell you but I'm here now, telling you and praying like crazy to any and all gods above that you feel the same way. Or at least a spark of what I feel for you and are willing to risk it with me….for me.”

He held his breath as the last sparks of blue and green sparkled in the sky. 

 

 

PAST: 

Louis watched as the curly haired boy tripped over the threshold into the men’s bathroom. He giggled and watched the boy actually apologies to the door frame. He shook his head and stood over the urinal willing himself to pee. He alway seemed to get stage fright around others when it came to bathroom duties. 

The boy with the brown curls walked up to the urinal next to Louis and smiled at him. Louis could see from his peripheral that he was looking at him but bathroom etiquette told him to keep his eyes forward and not make eyes contact. this boy must not have gotten the memo. 

And the thing was, Louis really wanted to get a good look at him. From quick glance as he tripped his way into the bathroom, Louis could tell he was cute. He just wanted to look and see _how_ cute. Damn bathroom etiquette.

Suddenly, the boy turned his whole body and subsequently peed on Louis’ shoe. Great, pee on his trainers. At least he’d opted not to wear his new Vans today. and now he had a good excuse to look directly at the boy.

“Oops,” the boy said sheepishly. He smiled wide and dimples popped in his cheeks, green eyes sparkling. 

Louis knew he was in trouble.

“Hi.”

**Author's Note:**

> [fic post](https://jovialchildalpaca.tumblr.com/post/172668011924/my-fics) :)


End file.
